Saturday, January 03, 2004


Parcelforce are the UK Post Office’s parcel delivery arm. During December, they were entrusted by Fortnum and Masons with the delivery of a Christmas present I purchased from them; for an elderly uncle of mine, who lives in London.

As at the time of writing (3 January 2004), my uncle has yet to receive his Christmas present. This despite the fact that he has waited in on five separate, pre arranged, occasions for them to deliver it to him.

Needless to say losing five days of his life waiting for Parcelforce to turn up, is more than a little annoying at his age. He does not, hardly surprisingly, wish to waste anymore of his time on this incompetent organisation.

I discussed this disgraceful situation with Fortnums, who noted that they have had a large number of complaints from their customers about Parcelforce.

Well done Parcelforce, you are the first organisation in 2004 to win my coveted “Worse Than Worthless” award.

Keep up the good work!

By the way lads, if you could see your way to delivering the present this side of Christmas 2004; my uncle and I would be very grateful!

7 January 2004


Fortnums, quite rightly, gave up trying to get Parcelforce to deliver the package. They instead sent it round today in their own van.

However, dear old Parcelforce don't seem to have given up. One hour after receiving the package from the Fortnum's van, my uncle received a note through his door from Parcelforce.

"We tried to deliver to you today, but the address is incomplete".

I wonder how it was then that Fortnums managed to deliver it without any problem; or indeed how Parcelforce were able to put the note through my uncle's door, if they didn't have the complete address?

Bets please as to when Parcelforce manage to complete this difficult task.

12 January 2004

Oh dear, Parcelforce really have lost the plot.

Nine days after I wrote to them about this mess, they sent me an email asking me for further details.

Wakey Wakey lads!

Here is my response together with their note....

"Dear ****,

Thank you for your note, albeit 9 days late.

The Fortnum's order number was 271972.

All rather academic now, as they have used their own van to deliver the items.

Quite where Parcelforce have put their package is anyone's guess.

Kind regards,

Ken Frost "The Living Brand"

From: ***
Date: Mon, 12 Jan 2004 10:53:13 +0000

Thank you for your enquiry.

I was sorry to read of the problems you experienced with our services.
Unfortunately, I am unable to trace the whereabouts of an item without a
parcel number. Can you obtain the number, and contact me again.

Alternatively, contact our enquiry line on 08708 501150, by Textphone 08000
855857 (for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing) or fax on 0113 205 6660.

Kind regards